I did it. I made it to full term. A whole whopping 39 weeks and 3 days of pregnancy before our second son, Drew, made his debut on May 10, 2023.
^^ Our last photos as a family of three – taken by my brother a couple days before Drew arrived.
Considering my first labor experience with Beau = water breaking at 32 weeks, on hospital bed rest and then being induced at 34 weeks… I’m really grateful for my OB’s support in getting to 39 weeks and helping me ‘avoid the NICU’ which was my only goal for this second pregnancy. I’m also really proud of myself for sticking to the plan once it was formulated which involved painful hormonal shots in the butt every week, cervix checks every two weeks and a physical prescription of ‘limited activity’ for my 2nd and 3rd trimesters.
At some point, I’ll find time to draft up and share a proper labor/birth story for Drew. In the meantime (errr these past 4 weeks – wait… it’s been a full month as of yesterday! gah), I’ve just been tryna keep my nose above water, juggling the care of a newborn and toddler…
Two under two. Whew. Your girl is tired and looking forward to the day when Beau and Drew will grow to entertain each other and become the best of friends (as so many friends and family members who have two kids close in age have shared). Buuuuuuut that’s not happening right now.
My Drew’s got a set of lungs that can reach Mariah Carey octave levels when he’s hungry and not given le boob right away. He goes from 0 to 100 reeeeeeal quick especially for the middle of the night feeds when I’m groggily moving much slower. And Beau, my sweet and sour patch toddler, had rough time at first getting used to there being another baby in the house. (The first time he saw me breastfeeding Drew, he started crying, ran over and legit tried to pull Drew off me…) But he’s starting to warm up, trotting over to give him kisses unprompted, patting his back rough/softly to help him burp and calling him “Dew”.
All that said, one unexpected highlight of my postpartum experience this second time around has been that I haven’t had any of severe ‘new mom anxiety’ and baby blues I dealt with my first go round. If anything, I feel like I’ve been able to tap into an unexpected reservoir of calm and confidence and adaptability, despite the daily hyper stimulation and lack of boundaries that comes with having two kids under two in our home.
A TMI example of said lack of boundaries = Last week, while Charles was taking a shower, I had to go pee while breastfeeding Drew and it could not wait (hello lack of pelvic floor/kegal strength postpartum). Somehow, I managed to get up and bring Drew with me (still attached to the nip) into our other bathroom and sit on the toilet before I leaked all over the place. And then a minute later, Beau bust open the door and started playing with his toy dinosaurs at my feet… Only to get distracted by the toilet paper, pulling it all out and then crying at the top of his lungs when I told him “don’t touch that.”
First time mom Setarra would’ve shut down, started sweating and crying along with her child… Second time mom Setarra was unfazed and sang Daniel Tiger’s “when you feel so mad that you want to roar; take a deep breath and count to four. 1, 2, 3, 4″ and then took a deep breath with her son and followed by a distraction technique of asking where the Stegosaurus dinosaur is.
In moments like the one I shared above, I try to remember that “I chose this life” (full on volunteered as tribute to Charles’s baby gravy) only to bust out laughing at myself because life is wild and parenting is even wilder.
I can do this. I will do this. I’m a bad bitch. (repeat)
Until next post.
xo, Setarra
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